On January 5th we went to see the perinatologist and received more difficult news....I have been diagnosed with polyhydramnios which is an increased amount of amniotic fluid. I knew that this was a possibility in the pregnancy due to an anencephalic babies not being able to swallow. The fluid is causing complications because it is pushing on my cervix and making it become thin. The doctor said that I will likely go into labor within the next couple of weeks and that he would be surprised if I was still pregnant in a month.
The news for me is just another heartbreak and brought a fresh fountain of tears. I found myself again starring into a mountainous feeling of inadequacy....I cannot even keep our son safe inside me. My hope to carry to term and have even just a few hours with him alive was shattered. The reality is that we can confidently say that we have tried all that we can to protect this life for as long as God will allow. These past 23 weeks have been a blessing for me. Despite the horrible morning sickness and discomfort of a growing belly, I have felt his life inside of me. I am a Mommy and no one can take that from me. We have been blessed with two sons that will be waiting for us in heaven to hold them and tell them that We love them more than words can describe.
Please pray that as I anxiously wait for labor to come that I will have peace. Pray that despite the tragedy of losing our son that we will have strength to celebrate his life and the miracle that he is. Pray that we can be a witness to our doctors and nurses that we serve a faithful God who is present even in the midst of utter darkness.
"As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother's womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things." Ecclesiastes 11:5. "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11....I do not know why this is happening or why we were chosen but I know that God is in control and good will come from this situation.
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"Deep calls to deep" and I weep bitter tears with you. May his arms of comfort engulf you and bring peace. Bless your hearts sweet Morgans.
ReplyDeleteLove, Holly
May The Great Almighty fill you with the peace and comfort that surpasses all understanding as he prepares your heart, mind and body for whatever lies ahead in this difficult and painful journey. I am praying for you today that your joy will endure through these unimaginable circumstances.
ReplyDeleteWith sincere love,
Wendy
My thoughts and prayers have been with you since Oct 24th...my prayers are with you from my heart. We may not have ever met, but I'm thankful to be a part of the prayer chain. I will continue to pray.
ReplyDeleteLove in Christ,
The prayer warrior.
Bernie
Rob & Jess, I don't know you real well, but I do know the Scharn/Morgan family, Jaleen, Jack & Aileen, and your Father, Rob. I have known your Grandparents about all my life. You have a great heritage in the Lord and it is evident you are following in that heritage. There is no doubt this is a sad tragedy, but as God promises, God is with you at every moment and loving your sons more than anyone can. You are & will be in my prayers. Peace, Cynthia Bell
ReplyDeleteDearest Rob and Jess,
ReplyDeletePlease know that Lisa, Myself, Jennifer, Kris and Jess, Erica, Kimmy, Simon too... are before THE ALMIGHTY on your behalf. You are special in His eyes in that you are partaking of affliction that is unthinkable both as a human and a mother.The comforter that passes all understanding is with you and will guide you each step. That which you have conceived will live again in HIM. The year before you were born, I was at this table and can advise of HIS deep, deep, love and mercy.
We cherish you...
Jon Illg and family...
Dear Rob and jess, This is the time the Lord has chosen for you and your little ones. You have showered the boys with love that will last for eternity. Cherished ones, may you be surrounded this night and coming dawn with strength and joy through your tears. Heaven rejoices at your faith and courage, yours and your little ones.
ReplyDeleteWe join all the prayers surrounding you and your little family,
God hold you all in His hands,
Peter & Chérie
Jess and Rob, My heart and prayers are with you. May God be with you in this hard and challenging time in ways that you can't even imagine. You are such an example in the faith, and trust you are walking in during this time. God bless your time that He gives you with your sons may it be something you can hold on to for eternity. Love you Jess, Juliet
ReplyDeleteJessica and Rob. You are so brave and so loyal to God's plan. What an example you are to us all. My prayers are with you and will be throughout your ordeal.
ReplyDelete